Week Two: Normalization, Shuffling Feet, and Stupid Games

Weekly novel for your distraction.

01.09.2007
7:45 pm

What's remarkable is how fast it normalizes. At first I couldn't help but notice how Asian everyone was, how Korean everyone was. Little Korean children sucking on little pacifiers, Korean teenagers bustling around downtown in parkas and sneakers, poor old Korean men endlessly pushing carts stacked high with cardboard up hills, sharp dressed suit and tie Koreans, all business all the time. At first I couldn't help but notice. All black eyes all black hair. But it fades. And I forget that I'm the only white person in the restaurant. And people become people again. Just people.

I think there is something emanating from people. At first you don't see it. You just see their face and their eyes, noses, and mouths. And you notice how they are the same or different. But then you don't notice it anymore. You just see a whole. And the whole is totally different than the sum of the parts.

We're not really seen as real teachers here. We're more for show, I think. Thus the kids don't show us the same respect that they show our Korean counterparts. David pointed out that that's because we're not real teachers. Seriously. I've never taught a day in my life before this. I never taught a Sunday School or a soccer team. Heck I've never even held a leadership position before. So no I'm not a real teacher, not by training or experience anyway. But still, I step into the room and stand before 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9 students. And somehow, for the next forty minutes, I have to figure out how to get them to listen to me. I have to help them remember things. And I have to get them to care. I have to do this for the sake of some kind of stupid Deadpoetssociety ideal, for their parents (who pay a lot of money), for the kids (who may one day, long from now, actually care), and I have to do it to maintain my own sanity.

Everything becomes utilitarian.

If it works, do it.

If it doesn't. Don't.

It's like one great big human psychology experiment.

(Some Food Side Notes: Yesterday I bought some fish jerky. Bones, skin, tails and all (no heads though). Actually I kinda like it. And I had some Korean BBQ. It was great. And only cost about $4.50. On the streets, farmers sell fresh produce.)



01.10.07
9:05 pm

it's been said that koreans shuffle on, eyes down at their feet, paying no heed to those around them. mind focused on the destination. i heard that they even, in their rush, will bump into others and not notice, but keep right on marching.

i don't know if this is true or not. but i was reminded of this stereotype tonight. on my way home from work. i was reminded by the quick one two of my shuffling feet. i was reminded by the blur of sidewalk brick. i was reminded by the music inserted in my ears.

i was simply tired and hungry. and i wanted to get home before my food got cold.

but then i stopped, i slowed my pace, i looked up. and i saw an angry cat who, ears slicked back, meowed a sickening meow, i saw three young boys sitting outside playing the arcade (faces lit by the flickering screen), i ran my fingers over faded korean letters on an old faded sign, i saw two toddlers with furry caps covering their ears.

And when I got home, I ate a cold dinner.

(On a side note, I finished the last episode of Firefly. I am sad. I may start over and watch the whole series again. I can't believe Fox canceled the show. Morons. Now I want to watch the movie again. But... I left it at home.)


01.11.2007
7:38 pm

there are two types of students i think: those that enjoy stupid games, and those that don't. i think i spent a good amount of my life in the latter category. being a fairly high-minded child, i discovered early the stupidity of stupid games. i refused to take part in such stupidity. i failed however to recognize the purpose of the stupid games. the function and utility of stupid games. and it wasn't until much later that i realized (am realizing) that from a certain perspective most (all?) actions can be described as a stupid game.

i am learning that high-minded adult pursuits are simply reflections of stupid children's games and vice versa. it's a procession of mirrors leading back and back down the hallway into our deepest consciousness. back and back until the hall dead ends, and in the dim light there is a solid wall riddled with holes. and there are a thousand hands with a thousand corks trying to plug the holes before the rains come and flood the dams.

A Brief(ish) Summarization of a Whirlwind

it's difficult to sit down and try to summarize all that has happened in the week that i've been in daegu. since school started, i haven't been bored for a moment. january is winter vacation in Korea. which means that the kids take extra classes. that's right, on vacation months, they go to school more. normally we have classes every afternoon from like 2-8 or something. but during intensive months, we have classes in the morning too. a couple of teachers are teaching 10 hours a day. i'm not teaching quite that much.

my apartment:



when i arrived at my apartment last week there wasn't a tv, a phone, or a washer. and the gas stovetop was barely working. yesterday i was pleasantly surprised to find that all that had been mended. except the stovetop, which they left in the box on the floor. my attempts to remove the old one, have thus far proved futile. i have managed to do little more than mangle the gas hose with a kitchen knife, a pair of pliers, and my house key. i bought a swiss army knife in switzerland this summer but, i left it at home.

other items that i have been supplied by either the school or the previous teacher/tenant: bookshelf, double bed, wardrobe, broken christmas tree, minifridge, old bar of soap, two forks, one knife, 6 metal chopsticks (in korea all the chopsticks are metal), a dinner table, four chairs (why do i need four chairs?), a toaster oven, a rice maker, four mugs, and some modest cooking utensils.

it's meager to be certain, but adequate.

there is no separation between the shower and the rest of the bathroom. and the washer drains out onto the floor.

the weather:
oh my the weather has been beautiful. even though i haven't been outside much in the past week. nice, brisk, jacket weather kind of cold. it's been great. the first day was freezing, but since then it's been wonderful.

the food:
korean food. it's good, but not great. i like it, but i don't love it. but it is cheap. if there is one thing that is cheap here it's the food (and the alcohol). you can buy two rolls of kimbap (sorta like sushi, but with more vegetables) for around $2. and that's a pretty decent (and healthy) lunch. if you want to splurge and eat out at a restaurant, you'll probably spend between $5-$8. also they make green tea flavored everything. there's even a green tea flavored Kellogg's cereal.

the classes:
i think when i signed my contract i was kinda thinking: no big deal i'll just go in and talk to kids in english for forty minutes and that will be class. i mean, how else could they justify hiring a foreigner with no experience to come over and teach? but during orientation i began to realize that it was a little more serious than that. i was really expected to be a bonafide teacher. wearing ties, and preparing lessons, and making teaching supplements.

so in two days in seoul i was taught how to be a teacher. then i was shipped off to daegu. where i was handed a bunch of books, and given a schedule of classes. since then, it's been such a whirlwind, i haven't had any time to reflect on anything. i think it's going pretty well. ok at least. i'm learning a lot. it's wild being a teacher, having that kind of power (even though i don't really have much power, we don't even really give the kids grades since this is an after-school school). all those things i used to think was stupid when my teachers did them, i'm doing. anything to get the kids to listen and obey.

so i write Xs and checks on the board by their names. and we play stupid games. sometimes i feel like Mrs. Croft, my high school spanish teacher. I say the same things over and over, and ask the students to repeat. now and then i fall into Mrs. Croft mode so deep I accidently say things like muy excellente. I also find myself trying to remember what Mr. Evan's, my high school physics teacher (and probably my favorite teacher of all time) used to do. So I change my voice randomly, and speak in outrageous accents.

every decision is really spur of the moment. how fast can you think? especially with the really little kids. attention span: 0. do a trick, draw on the board, what's in the bag, dance, sing, look at me, look at me, take that eraser out of your nose. all the while they look at me like "what the fudge are those noises he's making?"

and the junior highers. with boredom branded to their brows. stubborn, like pulling teeth from cows. i finally found something they are interested in, video games. i said, "chris, what kind of video games do you like?" he said, "killing people." i said, "chris, use a complete sentence." "huh?" "say, i like to kill people." this got a laugh. and then he said it. in a complete sentence. so i think all our lessons will now be on violence. and death.

honestly though. i liked it. i enjoyed my first week teaching. in spite of the mania. i have a few classes that i just love. all the kids are on the ball. and seem to be smart and learning. i got a hug on the legs by one of my little kids yesterday when i walked into class. gave me warm fuzzies.

i just hope i can hold up until february.